And I'll use you as a warning sign

[volitaunt]

Who: Okay this turned into a Poe catchall + Various
Where: Various locations/listed in the headings
When: May 1st-31st
What: May Catchall - specific closed prompts, some open threads
Warnings: N/A yet
[Open and Closed]



May 10th - Open

Tequila Mockingbird has Cassian's liquor of choice in the name, which is why Poe picked it. He's not a big drinker, but between the memories, the conversation with Jyn, the... party. Well. He has a few reasons to drink.

The reason he picked for tonight was to pour one out for L'ulo, for Muran, for the pilots whose names and faces he hasn't yet remembered. Not for his mother--it doesn't seem right, to drink for her. She wouldn't want it, her son inebriated and alone at a bar, wallowing in her memory. Poe won't pretend that isn't what he's doing. Wallowing, letting himself feel the grief and pain he tries so hard to outpace.

Jyn is right. He has to stop sometime, and taking the opportunity now to brace himself for future losses is better than breaking under one too many.

His table is in the corner, in a quiet part of the restaurant. Not by any virtue of paranoia. Poe doesn't have the same hardwired need to keep his back to a wall and his eyes on the exits that some veterans do. It was just the most private space he could find while still being around people. Drinking at home where Rey might have seen him would have felt worse than this, but drinking somewhere entirely alone wouldn't have been right either. He might not have squadmates to share a glass with, but having some form of life circulating around him is better than being entirely alone. Plus, there's BB-8, sitting underneath the table, domed head tilted to rest against Poe's leg.

Maker, he's glad to have his droid.


May 12th - Open

Poe is beating up a freestanding punching bag thing. He's been going to Crossbones Boxing in the morning on the days he doesn't work. He'll go stir-crazy if he just hangs around the house, and being grounded for this long is driving him bonkers as it is. He's tried to keep his head down, tried to be good, but man (thump, kick, wham) he going to blow a sensor if he doesn't get some air time.

It doesn't help that beating up things is usually the time he spends talking to BB-8 about whatever's on his mind. Here, where it's public and monitored like everywhere else, they have to keep up the same act. So BB-8 sits, watching, grumbling to himself with a towel draped over his head dome, while Poe tries to kill an inanimate object.


May 13th - Open

Poe is in a tree.

It is a tall tree. A very tall tree, near the edge of town, just inside those woods they aren't technically supposed to enter.

He is very high in this very tall tree.

Fuck gravity to be honest.

Comments

@ Go Ask Alice

[ouzel]

Cassian had left Jyn at home to become one with his couch, supplying her with snacks, several films and whatever else she could entertain herself with - considering the house is full of books from nearly every genre and at least a half-dozen recently purchased albums on vinyl, he's not too worried. Except he is, because he's Cassian and being worried about things is like a pastime. Or an OCD tick.

(She'd asked him how he does it, how he can do this, go to work and keep busy and act like things are okay and he didn't know how to say 'if I stop, if I pause, I'm not sure I could start again' so instead he'd said 'I don't know what else to do.')

He'd given himself the arbitrary date of the 5th of the following month before he would...what? Probably contact Natasha and General Organa under the presumption that Steve and Poe weren't coming back, but he's giving himself until at least the end of the month to start planning beyond that.

Right now, however, he's cleaning out the inside of the pastry case because at some point something with frosting touched the inner barrier and it's easier to take everything out while there's no one here and just clean the whole thing. So when the door opens there's a "Just a second!" and a hand waved out from the pastry case before Cassian takes a glance at who is actually waiting.

[volitaunt]

There's something incredibly reassuring about walking into Go Ask Alice to see Cassian looking like he's trying to make himself a home in the pastry case. It says on a visceral level what the General said on a logical one. Things are okay. People are okay. This isn't home, by any means, but seeing Cassian wrapped up in the mundane is a little like coming home anyway.

(A week, he thinks, still in shock. A week, gone like blinking.)

"You call this customer service?"

Because when in doubt, make a joke of things.

[ouzel]

Cassian starts at the sound of Poe's voice, forgetting the hazard of the heavy glass and plastic just above his skull too late; there's the definite sound of impact and mierda before Cassian hauls himself clear and frowns at Poe.

Only to be immediately replaced by a smile, and Cassian crossing the room to grab Poe by the shoulders.

"I'm sure I'll find some way of making it up." The poor customer service, that is. Either way, shut up and be hugged, Poe.

[volitaunt]

This hug is far easier to fall into than the General's embrace. Poe hugs Cassian like he would--like he did hug the members of Black Squadron after he came back from Jakku alive. One part apology, one part relief. One part reassurance that all limbs and extremities are where they're supposed to be.

He's glad he has people to hug him. It makes being Force-knows-where a little more bearable.

"Hey," he says, the greeting by now almost a joke itself.

[ouzel]

Cassian snorts, because he recognizes his catch phrase of 'how do I people' thank you very much, but he also pats Poe on the shoulder before pulling away.

"Are you hungry?" What happened, what does he know, what does he remember can all be dealt with later.

[volitaunt]

Cassian and food: another step toward normalcy.

"I could eat."

He's not hungry; he has no appetite whatsoever, at the moment, but he also has no idea when he actually ate last or what might happen in the next ten minutes, hour, day, that will need him in top form. Top form includes not passing out because he turned down a meal.

[ouzel]

It is, honestly, his only non-destructive coping mechanism.

"Alright." He doesn't presume coffee, all things considered; he's not sure how Poe actually feels, so Poe is going to be offered water first, plus whatever sandwiches are on hand. Cassian will even step out from behind the counter and eat with him, once he's put all the cupcakes back.

"How are you feeling?" It's a loaded, dangerous sort of question but. Cassian can't exactly not ask it.

[volitaunt]

"I'm...." Fine wouldn't even be a lie, really. As far as he can tell there's nothing physically wrong with him. "The General caught me outside. Told me how long it's been. I'm."

He'll drink the water, give himself a moment to get his reeling thoughts in order. "I'm fine. And that scares me."

A pause, then: "BB-8. Is he okay? Is he with you? Is everyone else all right, Jyn, did anything happen while I was gone?"

[ouzel]

"BB made it to me, but I'd gone on a recon with the Glaives so he was understandably distressed by the time we made it back to the house." Poor droid was sitting in an empty house for the better part of two hours while Cassian and Nyx talked to the mayor (and Jyn and Nyx's friend Luna scoped out the police station, but that didn't get them far).

"Nothing happened. Well. People demanded answers, publicly, but none were given. General Organa went to the police station to find you and didn't. Jyn is fine. We're fine."

[volitaunt]

He should be grateful. He should be grateful, but it doesn't make sense. All the pomp and circumstance, all the drama, for everything to be simply and inexplicably okay? Gone, for a week, and released with no warnings and no threats. Not tortured, that he can remember. Nothing.

It doesn't make sense, and he doesn't like it.

"Great," he says, in a tone that indicates it's anything but.